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”The new commander called the old one to ask what the reason was, and the previous commander said; “I don’t know. The commander before me had guards on the bench, so I just kept it going.”After contacting three previous commanders as well, and still getting the same answer, the new commander finally found a retired General (nearly 100 years old) and asked; “Sir, I am the new commander at the base you were in charge of 60 years ago. I found two men assigned to stand guard on a bench near the mess hall. Can you please tell me why?”After a pause, the General replied; “What? Is the paint still wet?”????????????????Thank tavern_knight for this one~“So when the first pig asked the man for straw to build his house with...”“What do you think the man was thinking?”One of the teacher’s students in the back of the room, called out, “Fuck me, a talking pig.”????????????????A well planned retirementThere is a lot written about this story. Apparently, it is a long-standing myth, but such a popular. “Do you like my outfit” ? Fuck did I like it, she looked fucking stunning !!I kicked my trousers to the corner of the cubicle as she pulled the curtain wide open to show me her outfit. Wow what a gorgeous site, not caring if the doors were properly locked I pulled her towards me, My cock began to grow even more, springing up for the sexy Santa in front of me, quickly standing to attention as her hand wrapped around my hard freshly shaved cock slowly stroking my cock, rolling my balls between her fingers teasing them even more, brushing my dick against her stockings as she rubbed it.My hands brushed their way along her thigh, over her black stockings and pulling her black lacy panties to one side. I pushed first one, two then three fingers inside her smooth shaved cunt.She whispered softly in my ear making the hair on my neck stand up sending a tingling sensation down my body right through to my balls “ I want you to fuck Mrs Santa, right here, right now”Her pussy was so wet her juices.
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